What if she's out of my league?
Run time: 02:24
January 31, 2025
Move yourself up in leagues. If you honestly identify as being in one level and you perceive this woman that you want to be with as being in a whole other level, well, that could be true—you could be at different levels. Or it could just be a perception on your part, where you're not giving yourself credit for what you are.
Either way, it doesn't matter. The job is still the same: you have to up your own game. You have to build out from the inside out. You have to fill out what league you're in, and you need to step into and earn the right to talk to whatever woman it is that you're most attracted to. You have to earn that through work, through discipline, through developing yourself.
It takes time. It takes effort. It's not going to happen on its own. But when you earn it, when you step into it, and when you own it, you'll move up and up and up. Because whether we like it or not, there are some people that are more attractive than others for various reasons.
Most of the reasons, though, that we find people attractive, it's not actually that they're just genetically more attractive. I've met people who are genetically very attractive, but they do nothing with it. They don't present themselves well. The people that we see and think, oh my gosh, they're way higher than I am, yes, they probably do have some good genetics, but they've also made a lot of effort to present themselves in a way that's very attractive.
When you do that with yourself, you will automatically start to move up, and you will start to be in that same area. The cool thing about being a guy is that physical appearance does matter, but it's not most of it. Really, the confidence that we have, what we're doing with our life, where we're going, how we're building ourselves, and how we're connecting with other people—that's a much larger piece than just our physical makeup.
So guys, we're kind of lucky that way. We can build a lot more attraction into it. If I meet a guy that's like 5'5"—I'm 6'0", so I'm in the lucky bracket of guys, above average in height—it's not something I've ever had to worry about. But when I meet a guy who's 5'4" or 5'5", and he's significantly shorter than me, but he doesn't flinch, you know, when we're talking and he brings the confidence, I feel intimidated by him.
I know on an instinctive level that guy has had to work three, four, five times harder than I have to build out his confidence. And I have nothing but respect for that man. Nothing but respect for him.
Either way, it doesn't matter. The job is still the same: you have to up your own game. You have to build out from the inside out. You have to fill out what league you're in, and you need to step into and earn the right to talk to whatever woman it is that you're most attracted to. You have to earn that through work, through discipline, through developing yourself.
It takes time. It takes effort. It's not going to happen on its own. But when you earn it, when you step into it, and when you own it, you'll move up and up and up. Because whether we like it or not, there are some people that are more attractive than others for various reasons.
Most of the reasons, though, that we find people attractive, it's not actually that they're just genetically more attractive. I've met people who are genetically very attractive, but they do nothing with it. They don't present themselves well. The people that we see and think, oh my gosh, they're way higher than I am, yes, they probably do have some good genetics, but they've also made a lot of effort to present themselves in a way that's very attractive.
When you do that with yourself, you will automatically start to move up, and you will start to be in that same area. The cool thing about being a guy is that physical appearance does matter, but it's not most of it. Really, the confidence that we have, what we're doing with our life, where we're going, how we're building ourselves, and how we're connecting with other people—that's a much larger piece than just our physical makeup.
So guys, we're kind of lucky that way. We can build a lot more attraction into it. If I meet a guy that's like 5'5"—I'm 6'0", so I'm in the lucky bracket of guys, above average in height—it's not something I've ever had to worry about. But when I meet a guy who's 5'4" or 5'5", and he's significantly shorter than me, but he doesn't flinch, you know, when we're talking and he brings the confidence, I feel intimidated by him.
I know on an instinctive level that guy has had to work three, four, five times harder than I have to build out his confidence. And I have nothing but respect for that man. Nothing but respect for him.