What should I do when I really like her?
Run time: 02:21
December 1, 2024
So when you go on a date and you're really, you know, you're really having a great time as a guy, you know, and you already know you like this girl, and you'd love to be in a relationship with her, okay, that's great and there's no need to hide, there's no need to hide your happiness at being in her company. Everybody likes to know that they're enjoyed, okay? So there's no reason to hide that.
The trick is, if we're suddenly like, oh, would you wanna be my girlfriend, and there's this grabbing onto them and weighing it down, and that's the one rule in the book—the one rule is don't burden the woman. And so if you do that too quickly, if you're like, "Oh, well, do you wanna be my girlfriend?" she's like, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, we had one date," you know, that's not gonna play out well. That's, again, that's burdening her. That's putting a responsibility on her to then take care of your needs, to meet your desires, to give you what you want. That is not the way you wanna play it.
Share with her the fact that you're happy in her presence. That's fine. That's not making a request of her. And really, what you wanna do is you wanna take that and just extend that into the next invitation and say, "Hey, I had a wonderful time with you. Next week, there's this concert that I was gonna go check out. It's a friend of mine that's playing down at this place. You know, you're the first person I thought of. Would you like to come with me?"
It's an invitation. You're telling her, hey, you popped up first in my mind, you're inviting her, but you're not talking about a relationship or anything like that. And over the dates, it'll eventually become apparent that she's like, boy, I like being with this guy too. I'm happy when I'm with this guy.
And when that's happening, the focus and attention on each other is just sort of apparent, and then you can share, and then you can get to the point where you're saying, "You know, this feels really good, you know, I'm not really interested in dating anybody else right now. How are you feeling about this? You know, does that sound good to you too?"
You put yourself out there first, and you're inviting her to join you with where you are. But asking her and putting the weight on her—that's the one rule that'll kill the magic. That'll kill all the happiness and fun that you're having, and it'll ruin the opportunity for her to open up and trust with you.
The trick is, if we're suddenly like, oh, would you wanna be my girlfriend, and there's this grabbing onto them and weighing it down, and that's the one rule in the book—the one rule is don't burden the woman. And so if you do that too quickly, if you're like, "Oh, well, do you wanna be my girlfriend?" she's like, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, we had one date," you know, that's not gonna play out well. That's, again, that's burdening her. That's putting a responsibility on her to then take care of your needs, to meet your desires, to give you what you want. That is not the way you wanna play it.
Share with her the fact that you're happy in her presence. That's fine. That's not making a request of her. And really, what you wanna do is you wanna take that and just extend that into the next invitation and say, "Hey, I had a wonderful time with you. Next week, there's this concert that I was gonna go check out. It's a friend of mine that's playing down at this place. You know, you're the first person I thought of. Would you like to come with me?"
It's an invitation. You're telling her, hey, you popped up first in my mind, you're inviting her, but you're not talking about a relationship or anything like that. And over the dates, it'll eventually become apparent that she's like, boy, I like being with this guy too. I'm happy when I'm with this guy.
And when that's happening, the focus and attention on each other is just sort of apparent, and then you can share, and then you can get to the point where you're saying, "You know, this feels really good, you know, I'm not really interested in dating anybody else right now. How are you feeling about this? You know, does that sound good to you too?"
You put yourself out there first, and you're inviting her to join you with where you are. But asking her and putting the weight on her—that's the one rule that'll kill the magic. That'll kill all the happiness and fun that you're having, and it'll ruin the opportunity for her to open up and trust with you.