So yeah, we show up. We've been working out, we're dressed well, we're doing the best that we can and everything. And particularly for guys, a lot of the time what we're thinking is that confidence is the big boost of attraction.

And it's true—there's no doubt about it. But when you go one step deeper into confidence, what you get is this openness. You have a relaxation that happens to you when you're truly confident—not the pushy, in-your-face kind of confidence. That's actually more like arrogance because you're competing against other people's attention.

But when you have natural confidence and you're open to listening, what happens is you have a natural openness to you. Openness is actually the secret to attraction.

They say for women that a smile is some of the best makeup she can put on. It's totally true, and it applies to guys too. If you're walking down the street and you just have this open smile because you're happy in your life, your attractiveness will jump by two or three times.

If I see a guy in a nice suit or, you know, in his zone, he's looking great, but he's all serious—that's okay. He's attractive, but he's over there. If I see the same guy and he has this openness and this smile, and the way that he looks me in the eyes just welcomes me in, I am drawn to him as a man.

I'm drawn to him, and I can only imagine that women are drawn to him even more than I am. That openness is actually the core of the attraction that is almost irresistible.

That openness is buried inside of your confidence as a person. So the whole point of developing confidence isn't to become larger than life.

The point of developing confidence is to step into your own shoes with comfort and ease so that you can open up and welcome the world in. Somebody that welcomes the world in—they are attractive. And that's where you wanna get to.